‘I hate you just because’

I think that it is very important to start discussing, as a community, the issues that our young people are facing. Today, I want to bring attention to the issue of bigotry that the teens in our community are confronted with.

I heard a statement a while ago that "whatever is happening in the community is happening in the school and what ever is happening in the school is happening in the community."

In the past few months, I heard various incidents involving our teens where the main issue was bigotry.  I'm not here to discuss political issues but let's face it, the hatred in some young people today is real. I truly believe if you asked some of the young people why they hate, they might not be able to articulate well the reason.

I have had the privilege of working with young people of various backgrounds. Every time I asked them "why don't you like that person," the most frequent answer is: "I just don't like them." If the person is bold enough, he or she would say, "I just hate them." 

Our area is at risk for a major tragedy if the community doesn't come together and address these issues. Culpeper County could be the pioneer of the great movement that teaches compassion and promotes empathy.

In today's society, hate is part of our culture. Don't be surprised that some of the smartest youth harbor feelings of prejudice and bigotry. The majority of the youth today are indeed wrestling with deeply buried anger due to these issues. Sometimes, it is very difficult for me to digest what I hear regarding anger and hatred.

At Brown University in Rhode Island, a black senior is beaten by three white students who tell her she meets a 'quota' and doesn't belong.  At the State University of New York in Binghamton, three students are charged in a racially motivated assault that left an Asian-American student with a fractured skull.

There are many more incidents wherein hatred played the key factor.

Kyle Wenker reflected on the experiences of Elizabeth Eckford, one of the Little Rock Nine who integrated Central High School in Arkansas 50 years ago this month in a poem he wrote Sept. 7:

"I can feel their glares from head to toe. As I strut toward the front doors. My heart racing, my feet quickly pacing, running from the hatred behind me. I feel the heat in Little Rock, not from the sun, but from the way they gawk. Am I not one of them- Or am I some freak show in their eyes- All I want is to learn, but every time that I turn, I see a force in my way. Eight boys and girls accompany me toward the school painted white, not with rollers or with brushes, but with a race, which to me, it crushes. Gov. Faubus takes action this day and calls the Guard to make a barrier. This split of race makes me cower when there is no help from Eisenhower. I am proud and black."

Fifty years after that day, we are still struggling with theses issues. In my opinion, all the anger and hatred issues that our youth are challenged with today are due to the fact that it is passed on from generation to generation.  

I read the story of a mother and her daughter that said, "While rummaging through an old box, my daughter, Claire, came across the stuffed bear I'd had when I was her age, a deeply loved creature named Teddy. 'How come Teddy has no fur-' she asked. 'Why doesn't she have eyes-'

I explained that my cousin's dog had chewed up Teddy when I was a kid. She was aghast. Gravely, she kissed Teddy's empty eye sockets. Somberly, she reported to her twin brother, Drew, what had happened. 'We've got to fix her,' she said."

We were created with a certain amount of compassion toward people, animals, and various other things. But with so much hatred and commotion in the world today, it is very apparent to me that we need to encourage this generation to be loving, kind, compassionate and generous.

I believe the best way to teach a child is not so much by giving a lecture, but rather by example.

It should be a part of daily life: how you respond to your child's questions, how you solve conflict in the community or in Wal-Mart. How you push his or her developing capacity to understand and think about other people.

If you don't want these issues of hatred and prejudice to continue, you need to remember that when you are at home with your family to be more careful about the words that come out of your mouth.

Every time you want to speak, I want you to remember that "Death and life are in the power of the tongues, and those who love it will eat its fruit." (Proverbs 18:21). The words that come out of your mouth carry great power.

I want you to notice that "the power of the tongue referred here is not the physical power or strength of the tongue as a body part or muscle, but the power of the words it creates. Our speech is tremendously important, powerful and very significant. Your words and mine are a matter of life and death.

Christ said "But I say to you that for every idle word men may speak, they will give account of it in the Day of Judgment." (Matthew 12:36). "For by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned." (Matthew 12:37).

These declarations of Jesus Christ should make us stop and think very carefully about what kind of words are coming out of our mouths and why.

You can make a difference by loving one another with your words. I'm sure you will agree with me that we dont want to have a Columbine High School experience here in Culpeper County.

E-mail